5 green flags to look for when choosing a therapist

With all the therapists out there, it's difficult to know what to look for and what matters when it comes to effectiveness and match. There are so many different types of therapists, modalities, approaches, and styles that it can be such an overwhelming process to even know where to start.

But really, effectiveness of a therapist comes down to how they approach the relationship, the modalities they use, and the human sitting across from them. Here are 5 green flags that you can pay attention to highlight that approach and make the therapist search a little less intimidating:

Flag #1 - They see the client as the expert

People who enter therapy do so with their own unique set of experiences, skills, perspectives, insights, and knowledge. Therapists who capitalize on these understand that the client is the best person to learn how to assess the helpfulness of a technique, pathway, situation, relationship or anything else that enters the therapy discussion. They know that no research and no therapeutic approach should ever override the client's own knowledge about their world.

Flag #2 - They are trauma-trained/informed

A therapist who is serious about doing no harm to clients will recognize that constructing their work carefully around the nuances of how trauma shows up in therapy is incredibly important. Many people come to therapy as a result of trauma. Even folks that don't may still have experiences in their past that may resurface during processing, and a therapist that assumes this is thinking protectively of their clients.

Being trauma-informed also means being shame-informed. Trauma and shame go together like peanut butter and jelly. Shame-informed might look like leading with curiosity instead of judgment, making ample room to understand coping mechanisms vs demonizing them, and naming systems of harm vs pathologizing normal responses to threats.

Flag #3 - they recognize the relationship is key

As has been thoroughly parsed out in the research, the quality of the therapeutic relationship is the strongest determining factor for effective therapy. A therapist that states this on their profile, website, or in a consultation call is likely attuned to the things needed to maintain a strong therapeutic bond to attempt repair if they mess up in session.

Language that you can look out for here that supports this approach is "unconditional positive regard" (no matter what you do, I still see you as good), person-centered, or a "Rogerian" therapist.

flag #4 - they offer a free consultation

A therapist that offers a free consultation might prioritize giving people the option to "test" the therapeutic alliance before any commitment is even necessary. Therapists will also use this consultation as a way to gather basic information about the issue someone wants help with in order to ensure they are practicing within their scope and not just prolonging someone's suffering with approaches that don't fit.

If a therapist doesn't offer a free consultation, that doesn't mean it's automatically a red flag. Some therapists work for clinics that don't give their employees the flexibility to provide this service. In this case, they will often use the intake session to clarify fit and scope.

Flag #5 - they see you as a person, not a problem

A therapist who takes the time to truly understand the root causes of your symptoms and connect all the dots sees you as a person who's been through hard things vs "the problem".

If this is your therapist, you'll likely feel seen, heard, and that those ways you respond to the world are not because of who you are but rather a reaction to what you've experienced. They know that the people-pleasing, the irritability, the procrastination, the pushing people away, etc., are all learned coping mechanisms and not stagnant personality traits or negative character qualities.

Finding a "green flag" therapist is hard but worth it

A therapist that practices in these ways might be tough to find, but don't give up! Many people go through 4-5 therapists on average before they find one that is the right fit. Take this list with you on your search so you can potentially find yours with less trial and error.