In the past decade, vulnerability and risk-taking has taken more of a front seat in the world of mental health. But what does it actually take to actually execute sticking your neck out in the business realm?
Let me tell you--if this is where you get stuck, you aren't doing anything wrong.
Being vulnerable and stepping outside of what's comfortable to you is supposed to feel confusing, sometimes complex, a definite fear activator, and unnatural. We are wired to sink into familiarity, structure, and routine, not to mention the pull we have to stay within the bounds we have practiced being boxed into for so long. Despite all this, we can override the urge to stay comfortable.
Here's seven tips to take with you when you want to take that leap with your business:
1. expect fear to be present
It's our natural inclination to want to concoct a way to leave our comfort zone with only confidence and bravery (how nice that would be!) instead of fear, self-doubt, and uncertainty. The problem is that expecting only to feel the comfortable stuff can ironically create further tension: the fight to suppress what's coming up cloaks the discomfort in a battle of the mind.
Instead, accepting that you will experience icky-ness because you're doing something different sends the message that all those uneasy feelings aren't bad or negative--they are just necessary elements of creating change (and may even be a sign that you are doing something really important and valuable in your business).
2. measure your vulnerability bandwidth
Going outside your comfort zone doesn't have to be black and white. For example, someone scared of driving may only have the capacity to drive on residential streets vs jumping straight to major highways. It's OK to take your time and build up to bigger things and the riskier career goals you may have.
You may find that some days you have the emotional wherewithal to conquer more significant steps and other days you need to take a slower pace. Signs that may point to deceleration are excessive anxiety, panic attacks, feelings of burnout, and/or overall fatigue.
Just know that vulnerability works best when applied with consistency vs extremeness or speed.
3. Have a safe place to come back to
To reap the benefits of taking risks in business (and in life in general), it's crucial to launch from a place of overall stability and/or safety. You aren't expected to be vulnerable all the time in every way just as a skydiver doesn't jump without a parachute or solid ground to land on.
Conversely, it's just as virtuous to return to a person or foundation that feels supportive and well-known. The brain learns best when it has a familiar place to come back to in order to integrate and process new information gathered while outside the zone of comfort.
4. Challenge your thoughts (not feelings)
Accepting what you feel doesn't mean you have to embrace the barrage of thoughts that follow (and there can be a lot!). Think of this like the analogy of a house: the layout is semipermanent but the room you choose to occupy isn't.
That may mean that a feeling arises, lures you into an area loud with self-doubt, imposter syndrome, or fearful thoughts, and then feeds off these thoughts as confirmatory fuel that what you feel is true (this happens rapidly in the brain). However, questioning those thoughts can move you outside the room, into a separate room, or can at least lessen the volume or power of what you're hearing.
For example, a self-doubt-related thought can be shifted from "My business is going to fail" to "I may fail, yet I have no evidence that I'm not strong enough to figure that out". Or a fear-related thought can be changed from "What if someone leaves a bad review?" to "It makes sense that this scares me and I can learn ways to respond to feedback and improve my business".
5. Focus on execution instead of outcome
You can't guarantee that what you are shooting for will happen in your career, but what you can guarantee is what you choose to do. If you are putting in that effort, that means something--that you've absolutely practiced bravery, courage, and put your fears to the test. What can you give yourself credit that you've already done?
You are still strengthening that vulnerability muscle (whether or not things pan out) making it more likely you'll be better prepared the next time you have something worth stepping out of the box for.
Also keep in mind that an unwanted outcome may just be a sign that execution can be modified. You can always return to the drawing board.
6. process what happened
Whether it's through journaling, a partner, a friend, a business colleague, a parent, or a counselor, give yourself that reflective time to walk through all the emotions and thoughts of taking risks. If it didn't go the way you'd hoped, what feelings did that bring up? Are you feeling hopeless about the outcome? Is this situation maybe more complex and requires a complex approach?
Perhaps it went great and looking back on your efforts can provide even more motivation to keep going or allow you the time to acknowledge your wins. Either way, it can bring up a lot so talking through it all can help to sort out all the intricacies of taking that vulnerable route.
7. Pat yourself on the back
Give yourself credit for the hard things you're doing because putting yourself out there in the business world is tough!
Why does this matter? Because we are far more driven to continue a difficult behavior when we pay attention to our completed attempts, regardless of the aftermath.
It's also the brain's job to focus on what went wrong so shifting that attention to fulfilling your part can change up some of that discouraging narrative.
So the next time you are thinking about taking that scary step, you aren't going into it ill-equipped. You have all you need within yourself to execute vulnerability.
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